Monday, May 14, 2007

The stud


Life is springing eternal not only in the verges, hedgerows and pastures; it’s also trying very hard in the field adjacent to my grey mare’s.

“Look, he’s doing it again,” has been the cry from the girls this weekend. “Did you see him?”

“He” is the new kid in town; a 13hh Welsh gelding with attitude. “Kid” is probably pushing it; he’s no spring chicken and he really should know better than to mount the in-season mares. But, even though he no longer has the required tackle, he’s certainly a ladies’ man. One grumpy old gal, who’ll never see 20 again, is revelling in the male attention; another played harder to get, but eventually succumbed to his persistence – or was it his pony charm?


Of course, it’s all futile – the poor love might think he’s a stallion, but he just doesn’t have the balls. He may have been cut late so he can still remember the desire he felt when he was entire; he may be a rig; he might just be a randy little man. The other alternative doesn’t bear thinking about. I might just have a closer look at his undercarriage next time I walk by …

17 comments:

The Grocer said...

Perhaps he is a frustrated reincarnation?
You sound a little jealous of the attention your girl is getting :)

Anonymous said...

What I've never understood about the male of the species of the animal kingdom [horses, dogs, cats, you name it..] is, why can't they just have a vasectomy ??? Then they could have all the pleasure without the pain ?

It seems rather harsh to get rid of the equipment all together ? Rather like using a sledgehammer to crack a nut..just a bit too drastic..

After all, you could even use those cheap 'klippits' they use to seal cereal packets after they've opened them.

Anonymous said...

Talking about geriatric shagging raising the old blood pressure...

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/northern_ireland/6645097.stm

Perhaps the horse's ought to have a little swimming pool as well ?

Drunk Mummy said...

M&M - this Welsh gelding sounds like a bloke I used to work with - although he definitely was just a randy little man with no balls. I never took a close look at his undercarriage, thank God.

mutterings and meanderings said...

Grocer, I would not be so light hearted if it were my mare he was mounting! She is in the next field. Her lovers are more demure - they are of the snog and sniff variety. They have deep bonds with her (she has two boyfriends). They are not one-night stands!

Anon, I suppose animals were castrated originally because there wasn't the technology to do anything else...

mutterings and meanderings said...

DM, we posted at the same time ..I told one of the girls I thought the gelding had 'small man syndrome' - then had to explain what that meant...

Omega Mum said...

I am having to keep this site secret from my eldest - she will track you down and arrive with a suitcase. Mind you ...... do you do boarding?

debio said...

My daughter had a Welsh pony, gelded - 13.2hh - an absolute gem until he was within whiff of a mare.
Because he was so handsome I forgave him anything...but a bit of a handful for my daughter.
Does it have something to do with Wales.....?

Nunhead Mum of One said...

I've got a lot to learn but I doubt very much if there will be a horse arriving Chez Moi (metaphorically speaking naturally)!

Still, have got riding lesson booked for Saturday!! yipppeeeeee!

lady macleod said...

LOL

mutterings and meanderings said...

OM, I don't do boarding, but the stables does lessons, hacks and B&B ...

Debio, this chaps is very handsome too...

NMO, I am very much looking forward to the report...

Thakyou, Lady M

Yorkshire Pudding said...

Thanks for directing me to "Stallions Direct" where I have picked up a few useful tips to improve my repertoire!

rilly super said...

M&M darling, you know I love you dearly but you must be aware that titling a post 'The Stud' and then proceeding to talk about matters that would make James Herriot blush is simply playing with a girl's emotions in a most cruel fashion, sigh

ziggi said...

sounds like my Freddie although he's NF. So much so that I did ask the vet in all seriousness if she'd left something behind but she insists there's nothing left in there and it's all in his mind - typical little man then, as you say!

Sarnia said...

Lovely pic.

My sister-in-law (she who trains - smalltime) has a horse running at Exeter tomorrow in the 3.25.

It's called Wendy's Dynamo and currently joint favourite.

I'm going to put a tenner on it and let you know how I get on!

mutterings and meanderings said...

YP, here's hoping Mrs YP benefits from what you've learned!

Rilly darling, I'm just sooo thoughless. I'm sorry!

Ziggi, I'd love to meet your Freddie - he sounds such a character...

Sarnia, unfortunately I cannot claim the credit for the picture -it was pilfered from a Google search!

Good luck tomorrow with Wendy's Dynamo!

Anonymous said...

eminem - perhaps what you need is to have two different blokes competing for your attention who you visit on alternate weekends to avoid boredom setting in ??