I have lost the grey mare’s passport; she’s not going on holiday but if I don’t have one, I’ll be in major trouble. It has been missing for around two years, and today I decided to officially declare it gone forever. Apparently it will cost me £22.50 for a duplicate.I am not, I must confess, the most organised of people. I am in my professional life – I juggle tasks and meet deadlines with aplomb; I’m even quite good at organising other people. My animals don’t know my dark secret either: they are fed, watered and worshipped.
But in my personal motto seems to be “why do today what you can put off until tomorrow”. Hence the lack of action over the passport, and my current mild panic about the horse and car insurance policies. Both are due for renewal shortly, and due to an oversight, I forgot to tell the companies I moved just before Christmas. Ditto the DVLA. Last time I was stopped by the police, the policeman wasn’t very impressed with the fragments of pink paper that piece together to make up my licence, either.
I am a hoarder – I am always convinced that if I throw something out I will need it. I have a forest-worth of paperwork stuffed in various folders, boxes and drawers. But last year, I couldn’t find my MOT certificate and had to pay for another one. I can easily lay my hands on a letter of appointment from 1992 or an electricity bill from 1996. What’s the betting my insurance details won’t be quite so easy to find?
23 comments:
Using the English pound to buy things makes me feel rich, until I convert it to AUD$. I know it has nothing to do with the post but you Brit's sure do keep the value of sterling.
I'm in the same boat as you re: passports, except I know what happened to mine. Lets just say I was a ghost in the system for a little while. Wasn't even a legal citizen for a few years of my life. I couldn't be kicked out because I had no passport and no point of origin and I couldn't stay because I wasn't a citizen. It was all very strange.
Another Northumbrain blog female. Wonder how far apart we all live?
How will you get the lovely grey mare into that tiny "Photo-Me" booth for her passport photo?
I'm sure the moment you get a replacement/duplicate the original will turn up. Of course it will be of no use then nor consolation either.
I'm just as bad.
Last year I lost my daughter's American passport - I think it dropped out of my bag on a train from Gatwick to Brighton.
Didn't do anything about it until Feb this year.
In the meantime I got her own UK passport. (We're all Brits - she just happened to born in the US).
God - these passports things are bad enough for your kids - but for horses?
You could paint stripes on the horse and pretend she is a zebra- they don't need a passport.
Since I tidied my bedroom last week I have had the zeal of the life laundry woman and I am willing to come and throw out all your old bills in return for a huge fee and being able to shame you on national TV. I already went to Ruth's (wisewoman) and got rid of 3 carrier bags of books to the Samaritans.
I do hope you got sorted out Orhan ...
Welcome @themill. I am on the coast.
Drunk Mummy, it's actually more complicated than a Photo Me booth - you have to fill in a diagram full of 'whorls' (where the hair grows in different directions)etc.
Mountainear, that's one of the reasons why I have been putting off getting a new one.
Sarnia, you are very cosmopolitan - but then you do support Chelski! ;)
Gill, someone gave me the life laundry woman's book. I don't know where it is ...
So am I.
M&M, you're not being evasive about your horses lack of a passport because she is actually an asylum seeker from Belgium are you dear? I hope she is allowed to remain in the UK and does not meet the same fate of my friend's labrador who was deported back to Korea and never heard of again.
Gill, are the books for the samaritans for the volunteers to read whilst they wait for calls? I'm obviously not phoning them often enough about my grim life if they have so much time on their hands.
M&M...I'm another chaotically organised person. You don't have large cardboard boxes stashed around the house full of junk mail, important documants and old newspaper cuttings do you? That is where I find most things.
Failing that try the laundry basket or the fridge....
I am very unorganised at home. This is because at work I have to organise some feckless middle aged man so why would I want to take my work home? I have bits of paper, bills, wage slips etc. stuffed in a cardboard box in the cupboard of the spare room. God knows what I'm going to do with it when the in-laws come and stay in a a couple of weeks.
M&M you should pray to St Anthony the patron saint of lost things. SAy "st anthony st anthony bring back what is lost to me" think of the thing that is lost and he will find it for you. It really does work!
For a few hours a month I am very tidy... then it all start gradually going down hill again!
I think the samaritans are kept busy listening to wankers.
gill - what is that supposed to mean ?
I hope you're not a volunteer there then Gill dear!
anonymous I know several people who volunteer for the Samaritans and a large part of their day is taken up listening to men masturbating on the phone.
and occasionally women
Good God, Gill, I thought that there were special premium rate lines for that!
Karen, will St Anthony help a non-Catholic with witchy leanings? I tried to douse for it with a pendant once but that didn't work
Some wankers are just too mean to pay for premium rate lines!
St Anthony will work for all those who believe in him- regardless of religion, but he especially likes witchy women!!
gill, no no no !! that is so so wrong ! i was beginning to worry that you were of the 'pull yourself together' variety when it came to people who are in despair. and i don't think that would quite have worked for that poor scottish doctor. how on earth did the nhs get to a point where it treats people so shittily ? anyway at least with the samaritans the w@n*ers are at the end of the phone.
i used to work in the head office of a 'large financial services' co and used to hear stories of said w'ers actually coming into the branch [if you know what I mean]
Uggghhh.. I think we should build an enclave for nice people in the border area between scotland and england and only allow nice people to live there.
The library is another place where they like to hang out- literally!
anonymous, talking of enclaves on the border there was a story on look north this week that berwick upon tweed was such an enclave on accout of its tumoultuous and disputed history. in the crimean war therefore, England, Scotland and Berwick upon tweed declared war on russia, but berwick was missed off the peace treaty by accident and the story goes that the town remains at war with Russia to this day. we probably shouldn't send all the nice people there in case things flare up a bit.
Berwick is not my favourite place in the world. It has a unique, very cold weather system, a language all of its own - 'dugal' is a dog, 'bar-ree' is gorgeous - and don't ever accuse the inhabitants of speaking with a Scottish accent or you'll be lynched!
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